Pity Party

I love the way I really hate myself I profit off a lack of mental health My mood shows up on a conveyor belt It's crushing, my guts are on the floor I said I wanted to get a normal job I romanticize a life I think I want Until I'm handing you the bill And you say you used to like my band (you used to like my band) Is this forever? Am I a name that you'll remember? (Will you remember? Will you remember? Will you?) (Will you remember? Will you remember?) It's all just a pity party, oh, what a joy, what a crowd I'll tell you, "I'm, oh, so sorry," 'cause it's embarrassing now It's a parody of pleasure, lips big and red like a clown It's all just a pity party, so cry for me or get out (Oh, oh, oh) It's crazy how I almost died this year And now I'm shotgunning my very first beer And dad keeps telling me that his end is near Am I dying, waiting for him to die? I'll starve my body for the 17th time Said I ate my lunch, what's another lie? I'm over being mediocre I wanna be smaller and smarter or just okay Don't need forever (Don't need forever, don't need forever, don't need it) (Don't need forever) Am I a name that you'll remember? (Will you remember? Will you remember? Will you?) Mm-mm (Will you remember? Will you?) It's all just a pity party, oh, what a joy, what a crowd (hey, hey, hey) I'll tell you, "I'm, oh, so sorry," 'cause it's embarrassing now It's a parody of pleasure, lips big and red like a clown It's all just a pity party, so cry for me or get out Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh Oh-oh, oh-oh, oh-oh-oh I hate that I keep pushing friends away I'm all or nothing 'til I'm alone and gray Am I missing something? Are you scared to stay? Can you come over and make me feel like shit? I promise that I won't cut my arms 'Cause I'm so sick of having long sleeves on my body I'll throw a pity party Leave your problems at the door, 'cause it's about me Until it's over (Until it's over, until it's over) (Until it's over) And my ex is crying on my shoulder (On my shoulder, on my shoulder) (On my shoulder) Welcome to my pity party, gear up it's gonna get loud Let's take it to the beginning, this song is embarrassing now