It Ain't Me

I wash my truck on Saturdays

cuz Saturdayʼs the day you wash your truck

I donʼt like automated operated coin machines where Iʼll stuck

So I wash it my driveway

Cuz thatʼs my way

To save a nickel and a dime

Thatʼs when I notice Mr. Johnson steppin out to sneak a peak at my backside

Now Kitty Johnson, bless her heart,

She tries her hardest just to be the perfect wife

cooks breakfast lunch and dinner

But it ainʼt enough to keep him satisfied

And Iʼve never said a word to that poor woman, But I can see it in her eyes

if looks could kill then Kittyʼs got me hanging like an apron on a line

It ainʼt me

It ainʼt me

You got it right thereʼs something wrong but it ainʼt me

It ainʼt me

Iʼm just workin on my tan

I ainʼt worried bout your man

I understand but damn,

it ainʼt me

Sheʼs always talkin bout me at her ladies bible study at the church

She puts me on the prayer list with the terrorists and the drag queens and the

pervs

Next time she comes a-knocking at my door to tell me Iʼm not lady like

Iʼll tell her she can kiss my ass or she can keep her creepy husband stuck inside

It ainʼt me

It ainʼt me

You got it right thereʼs something wrong but it ainʼt me

It ainʼt me

Iʼm just workin on my tan

I ainʼt worried bout your man

I understand but damn,

it ainʼt me

Iʼm just workin on my tan

I ainʼt worried bout your man

I get it maʼam, but damn,

it ainʼt me