Down's Syndrome Girl (From "Family Guy")

You've got to look your best tonight, you tubby little parasite

'Cause there's a lovely lady and she's waiting for you

And though her pretty face may seem a special person's wettest dream

Before you get to see it, there are things you must do

We'll try a tie and boutonniere of yellow

Or a rose that shows that you're a classy fellow

With the posh panache of Jefferson at Monticello

Busting out a mile with style

I know you just can't wait to stare at all that luscious orange hair

But, boy, before you touch a single curl

You must impress that ultra blooming, all-consuming, poorly grooming

Down Syndrome girl

On any normal day, you reek as if you're on a farting streak

Your finger's up your nose, and you are dripping with drool

But if you want a lady's love, you're better off by smelling of

A gentleman's cologne instead of sneakers and stool

A squirt, a spurt of something just for Ellen

And you'll see that she will find you so compelling

And she does because the only smell that she'll be smelling

Won't be coming from your bum

You wanna take that little whore and spin her on the dancing floor

But boy, before you do a single twirl

You must impress that effervescing, self-possessing, no BS-ing

Down Syndrome girl

Her eyes are emerald portals to a secret land of love

And they seem to say, "We'll open just for Chris"

They shine like sunny weather, and they're close enough together

That if they should so desire to create a little fire

They could reach across her nose and give each other a kiss

My boy, between the two of us, we'll get you on that shorty bus

And then you're gonna take it for a whirl

Now go impress that super-thrilling, wish-fulfilling, yoo-hoo spilling

Ultra-swinging, boner-bringing, gaily singing, dingalinging

Stupefying, fortifying, as of Monday, shoelace tying

Stimulating, titillating, kitty-cat impersonating

Mega-rocking, pillow-talking, just a little crooked walking

Coyly pouting, booby-sprouting, for some reason always shouting

Fascinating, captivating, happiness and joy creating

Down Syndrome Girl!