If You Really Really Love Me

If you really really really really love me

Then you really really really gotta show me

Don't whine when I put it in your booty

Or if I'm up all night playing Call of Duty

Never hassle me because I'm unemployed

If I sleep all day, don't get annoyed

Then I'll know that you really really

Really really really really really love me

If you really really love me

If you really truly wanna make me feel nice

Make it so I don't ever have to ask twice

Let me have the keys to your Mercedes

Don't get mad when I bring home some ladies

If I get fat and look like an egg

Lie to me and tell me I'm in great shape

Then I'll know that you really really really

Really really really love me

If you wonder what I did with the rent

Just consider it money well spent

I bought trunks and a new surfboard

So just go tell your dumb landlord

That you love me

You really really love me

If I have sex with your friend Melanie

Don't act like it's some kind of felony

It's not uncommon for this kind of infidelity

It happens to a lot of guys like Tiger Woods and me

Just be happy that I'm hung like a horse

And you get to ride the pony of course

'Cause I'm really really really really really really really

Really really fond of you too

When you think it's really sucking, girl

All your friends will say, you lucky girl

You got a man who's hot, you see

All the girls wanna be with me

'Cause they love me

They really really love me

Yes they do

If you really really really really love me

You'd never make me hang out with your family

Your mom sucks and your dad really hates me

When I try to borrow money, he berates me

So Molly thinks that I'm too old for you

'Cause you're nineteen and I'm fifty-two

He can't see that you really really really

Really really really love me

You really really really really really

Really really really love me

If you really really love me