You Ominously End

I yearned to be the first to reach out on your birthday

Oh, what a twisted way of showing you I care

Threatened to show all your new friends our secret handshake

And like Halloween, I'll be here once a year

When you tried to take your life

We're just happy you survived

Confirmed you can't do nothing right

Like you couldn't even die

If you tried

You're not mad, but I can tell I've disappointed you

That kind of quiet creates tension in a home

Three-hundred people in this town, not one worth driving to

You're the reason for all the crosses by the road

I am all-knowing about you, it's a burden I bear

I think my brain would be empty if not for the cell we share

I fixate on shit you forgot

Like a hard drive of your half-baked thoughts

When you tried to take your life

You felt ashamed that you survived

Thought if there was one thing you'd do right

It'd be the best Irish goodbye

Man, I'm missing you to death

But it hasn't come to that

You can ominously end

But not yet, not yet

Not yet, not yet

Dead set on leaving the world the same way you had found

I'll crane my neck, looking up to somebody in the ground

I was born to stay right here, and you can't stay in one spot

I don't move, so you can reference how far you have gone

Look back until I'm lost

Till you've finally forgot

If you were always notified when you were in the dreams I've dreamt

I think you'd be the one ignoring all my calls

I've known you long enough to know when you are playing dead

When I check in, it's like I'm feeling for a pulse