Awesome, awesome, awesome, awesome

I don't necessarily need to be here for this

Can I—

I'm gonna keep the headphones though

Motherfucker, I'm awesome!

No, you're not, dude, don't lie, I'm awesome!

I'm drivin' 'round in my mom's ride, I'm awesome!

A quarter of my life gone by, and I met all my friends online

Motherfucker, I'm awesome!

I will run away from a brawl, I'm awesome!

There's no voicemail, nobody called, I'm awesome!

I can't afford to buy eight balls, and I talk to myself on my Facebook wall

You know my pants sag low

Even though that went out of style like ten years ago

Spose, I got the swagger of a cripple

I got little biceps, getting fatter in the middle

And lyrically, I'm not the best

Physically the opposite of Randy Moss, and yet

So preposterous, feel the awesomeness

The most obnoxious guest up at the sausage fest

Oh yes, the girls are repulsed

So I hide in my hood like I'm joining a cult

I'm as nervous as my cat, ol' Dirty Curtis

All my writtens are bitten and all my verses are purchased

Me? I'll never date an actress, got too many back zits

Plus, my whole home aroma is cat piss

Every show I do is poorly promoted

And if you like this, it's 'cause my little sister wrote it

I'm awesome!

No, you're not, dude, don't lie, I'm awesome!

I'm drivin' 'round in my mom's ride, I'm awesome!

A quarter of my life gone by, and I met all my friends online

Motherfucker, I'm awesome!

I will run away from a brawl, I'm awesome!

There's no voicemail, nobody called, I'm awesome!

I can't afford to buy eight balls, and I talk to myself on my Facebook wall, I'm awesome!

Check it out, I'm from Maine and I don't hunt, and I can't ski (Nope)

Smoke weed but I can't roll blunts

Find me whipped by my wifey, my neck not icy

Eatin' at McDonald's because Subway's pricey

And my unibrow is plucked

Just asked my mom if I could borrow ten bucks

She's like, "For what? Blunt wraps and some Heinekens?

You skinny prick, go get a gym membership and vitamins!"

I'm like, "Mom, please, don't blame it on me

I got my bad habits from you, Dad, and Aunt Steve"

My attitude's sour but my futon's sweet

And the hair on my ass, it is Jumanji

Suit untailored, ringtone Taylor Swift

Can't tweet up on my Twitter 'cause I haven't done shit

Bank account red, body ungroomed

Only thing good about me is I'm off stage soon

I'm awesome!

No, you're not, dude, don't lie, I'm awesome!

I'm drivin' 'round in my mom's ride, I'm awesome!

A quarter of my life gone by, and I met all my friends online

Motherfucker, I'm awesome!

I will run away from a brawl, I'm awesome!

There's no voicemail, nobody called, I'm awesome!

I can't afford to buy eight balls, and I talk to myself on my Facebook wall, I'm awesome!

Furthermore, I am cornier than Ethanol, cheesier than Provolone

I spent ages eight to ten living in a motor home

With a ego the size of Tim Duncan

Even though I got shit for brains like a blumpkin

I'm twenty-four, serving lobster rolls

Because I spent a decade filling Optimos

And I'm not even the bomb in Maine

On my game, I'm only 'bout as sexy as John McCain

Now put your hands up if you have nightmares

If you wouldn't man up if there was a fight here

If you got dandruff, if you drink light beer

I'm out of breath

But I'm awesome!

No, you're not, dude, don't lie, I'm awesome!

I'm drivin' 'round in my mom's ride, I'm awesome!

A quarter of my life gone by, and I met all my friends online

Motherfucker, I'm awesome!

I will run away from a brawl, I'm awesome!

There's no voicemail, nobody called, I'm awesome!

I can't afford to buy eight balls, and I talk to myself on my Facebook wall, I'm awesome