Lapsed Catholics

(spoken word)

Whose prison break is the most impressive?

I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go Tim Robbins in Jacob's Ladder

Such patience, such verve and poise

But wait a minute, shit, that's the wrong film

Morgan Freeman would roll in his grave, if he were dead

Which he nearly was, if you believe the hysterical gung-ho Technicolor crapfest

That is Sky News, or Murdoch Live, or whatever the hell the devil calls himself

Sky News, or Murdoch Live, or whatever the hell the devil calls himself

I preferred him when he was red and blatant, that guy

I liked him better when he swooped around the land indiscriminately

Bending wills and souls with glee

Hurrying kids to their graves at sea

Magnetically debasing the casts of the earth

In a terrible, wonderful focus of horrors

A justice of sorts if you listen to fools who have dressed in the dark for a bet

A justice of sorts if you listen to fools who have dressed in the dark for a bet

A justice of sorts if you listen to fools who have dressed in the dark for a bet

A justice of sorts if you listen to fools who have dressed in the dark for a bet

(sung)

I'm on a mercy mission to prove to my new love

That she is my nothing, that she is my no-one

That even these triumphs are nothing without her

That even these triumphs are empty

But anyway, revel in it

Be grateful when the comfort comes

I can't stand still for the rest of my life

But there's always lapsed Catholics

I need a change of focus, a badge of honour

A mark of progress, a rope to hang from

To make a difference I need composure

To make a difference, to make it

But anyway, revel in it

Be grateful when the comfort comes

I can't stand still for the rest of my life

But there's always lapsed Catholics

The trick is, don't start

Be aware, be alert

The truth is, no words are

Worthy to hang on her

Lapsed Catholics are the worst

Lapsed Catholics are the worst

Lapsed Catholics are the worst

Lapsed Catholics are the worst

Give me something I can take away

Give me something I can take away

Give me something I can take away

Give me something I can take away

The problem with these people is

They understand the obvious

The problem with these people is

They understand their vices, not their faults

Lapsed Catholics are the worst

It's part of who they were

And who they'll be again

And who they'll be again