The Christmas Bush (feat. The BB Children's Choir)

Gather around children.

This is a story about what Christmas was like

Not too long ago.

Yes, it was a simpler time when people could actually think for themselves.

Summer\'s gone & Winter\'s here

It\'s my favorite time of year

Let the Angels sing on high

Listen and I\'ll tell you why

It\'s time for the Christmas bush

Bulging out underneath her tush

Come on baby grow it long

Like a pillow for my dong

Hi, Mrs. Rogers!

Hi Larry, Hi Tommy.

Nice bush!

Aren’t you sweet.

 

You do have a beautiful bush, Mrs. Rogers! What’s your secret?

Well, it’s no secret, really. Sometimes if you just leave them alone, they just sprout up all by themselves!

 

Impressive! Merry Christmas!

I like to run my fingers through it when it\'s really thick

And see it glisten by the fire as we wait for old St. Nick

But she shaves it down & keeps it trim each and every summer

But the landing strip ain\'t so hip I think it\'s a bummer

So bring back the Christmas bush

Makes it better for the push

Come on baby let it grow

Keeps you warm in the winter snow

Now just a gosh darn moment, you two! Are you suggesting that we stop shaving altogether?

No, Mrs.Weaver we’re not looking for Sasquatch here.

There are rules!

Regulations!

A code to live by!

Rules? Regulations? Well what are they then, by golly?

O.K., here’s the deal.

If it pokes out side of the bikini line

trim em’ back, that’s just fine

But anything inside the V

Holy Jesus let em\' be

We love the Christmas bush

Real tight panties make it smoosh

Makes me want to scream and shout

to see how far her muff sticks out

This younger generation has a really stupid trend

They shave it down all the way God when will it end

They\'ve ruined all the porno and it\'s really gotten lame

We can’t get aroused if all the ladies look the same

Yes we do! yes we do! we love bushes how bout you!

Yes we do! yes we do! we love bushes how bout you!

So bring in the Christmas muff

Blowin in the breeze when she\'s in the buff

Come on baby keep it natch

No one likes a Hitler patch

So grow it wild thick with fur

I don\'t want a little girl

You can have your Christmas ham

I just want a bearded clam

Come on girls don\'t be a bore

Just like all those porno whores

Put that shaving cream away

Save it for another day

If you really love me so,

Let it grow let it grow let it grow

God bless us everyone!