chekhov's guns

If I had a bad day every time that I'd said I had a bad day

Then I wouldn't be the owner of this snooker hall

My winning smile trained on a second one

With the utmost respect you are not a big fish until you sink ships

Well my ship is not sinking in this bathtub

It is empty and the taps are just monuments

The terror of sign-posts has reduced my social circle

To the man in the corner-shop who has never changed a light-bulb

If I knew a good thing every time that I'd said I knew a good thing

Then I wouldn't be a member of this firing squad

And my throat would not burn with the friction

I am totally fine with you using my picture in your pamphlets

If in turn you will paint me like your piglets

If in turn you will paint me like your piglets

Don't hold back

My medium-sized regrets are dependent on perspective

When you've got so many in the bank they're impossible to measure

Ch ch ch ch chekhov's guns

Shout out the end at the top of your lungs

Cos who's got time to be fucking around?

Not me, not you, or the other characters

Ch ch ch ch chekhov's guns

Now shout out the end at the top of your lungs

Cos who's got time to be fucking around?

Not me, not you, or the other characters

No truth told, no manners sold

No conspiracy, no conspiracy, no conspiracy

No truth told, no manners sold

No conspiracy, no conspiracy, no conspiracy

No truth told, no manners sold

No conspiracy, no conspiracy, no conspiracy

No truth told, no manners sold

No conspiracy, no conspiracy, no conspiracy

Ch ch ch ch chekhov's guns

Shout out the end at the top of your lungs

Cos who's got time to be fucking around?

Not me, not you, or the other characters

Ch ch ch ch chekhov's guns

Now shout out the end at the top of your lungs

Cos who's got time to be fucking around?

Not me, not you, or the other characters