The Actor

Last night, I did this thing where I talked to random people at the bar

I took some big old swings and it actually got me kind of farther than I ever thought it would

I used to have more confidence in college

When I knew every person at the party, I was rock solid

Now I'm a stranger to Sara with no H

And I'm paying thirteen dollars for her drink

And she told me I remind her of Ted Mosby

I said, "Honestly I'm flattered", she said, "Don't be"

I said, "Really, no I'm flattered, Ted's annoying but I like Josh Radnor"

She said, "Who?", I said, "The actor"

I'm lonely on Long Island and I wanna let my haircut down

And I look for love online, but there's gotta be more ways to take advantage of my prime, I mean, come on

I used to have more confidence in high school

When I won choir's biggest heartthrob and I felt cool when I smoked

But now marijuana makes me overthink

And I'm paying eighteen dollars for a drink

And she told me I remind her of Ted Mosby

"Is it cause I keep talking?", she said, "Mostly"

"Not to say that I'm not flattered, after all I really like Josh Radnor"

She said, "Who?", I said, "The actor"

She said, "Who?", I said, "The actor"

She said, "Who?", I said, "The actor who plays him on TV"

On TV

On TV

On TV

And I don't recognize this person I've become here at the bar

I kind of like it though, I'm giving finance bro and that's a start

And although I'm known to share my deepest secrets right away

I don't think Sara with no H needs to know yet that I crochet

Guess I can be the actor, you can cue the laughter

I can play a character, life ain't so different from TV

We each said, "I could have another", I said, "Jinx"

Now I'm paying forty dollars for our drinks

And she told me I remind her of Ted Mosby

I said, "Honestly, I'll take Ted over Barney"

She said, "Barney's problematic but I've always loved Neil Patrick Harris"

I said, "Who?", she said, "The actor"

I said, "Who?", she said, "The actor"

"Do you like him or like the actor who plays him?"

On TV

On TV

On TV

On TV

"This one's on me"