The Auctioneer

Hey, well alright, sir here we go there an' what are ya gonna give for 'em?

I have a 600 dollar down here now 10 now 25 an' now 35, an' now there 50, now 60, will ya give me 60, now 75, 75 another 85 dollars and buy 'em there

There was a boy in Arkansas who wouldn't listen to his ma

When she told him he should go to school

He'd sneak away in the afternoon, take a little walk then pretty soon

You'd find him at the local auction barn

He'd stand and listen carefully then pretty soon he began to see

How the auctioneer could talk so rapidly

He said, "Oh my it's do or die I've got to learn that auction cry

Gotta make my mark and be an auctioneer"

25 dollar bid it now, 30 dollar 30

Will ya gimme 30 make it a 30 bid it on a 30 dollar

Will ya gimme 30, who'll bid a 30 dollar bid?

30 dollar bid it now 35

Will ya gimme 35 to make it a 35 to bid it at 35

Who would a-bid it at a 35 dollar bid?

As time went on he did his best and all could see he didn't jest

He practiced calling bids both night and day

His pap'd find him behind the barn just a-workin up an awful storm

As he tried to imitate the auctioneer

Then his pap said "Son we just can't stand to have a mediocre man

Sellin' things at auction usin' our good name

I'll send you off to auction school and then you'll be nobody's fool

You can take your place among the best"

35 dollar bid it now, 40 dollar 40

Will ya gimme 40 make it a 40 bid it on a 40 dollar

Will ya gimme 40, who'll bid a 40 dollar bid?

40 dollar bid it now 45

Will ya gimme 45 to make it a 45 to bid it at 45

Who would a-bid it at a 45 dollar bid?

So from that boy who went to school there grew a man who played it cool

He came back home a full fledged auctioneer

And the people came from miles around just to hear him make that rhythmic sound

That filled their hearts with such a happy cheer

His fame went out from shore to shore he had all he could do and more

He had to buy a plane to get around

Now he's the tops in all the land let's pause to give that man a hand

He's the best of all the auctioneers

45 dollar bid it now, 50 dollar 50

Will ya gimme 50 make it a 50 bid it on a 50 dollar

Will ya gimme 50, who'll bid a 50 dollar bid?

50 dollar bid it now 55

Will ya gimme 55 to make it a 55 to bid it at 55

Sold that hog for a 50 dollar bill

Hey, alright, sir open the gate, let em' out and walk 'em boys. Here a comes a lot number 29 in, what're ya gonna give for 'em? I got a 25 I get a 35 an' now a 50 make it 50 better t' make it 55, 60, will ya give me 65, 75, an' now 85, an' now 95, 100, an' now a 25, an' get a 75 an' a 2 an' a 3 an' a 4 an' a 5 an' a 6 an' a 7 an' a 800 dollars gonna buy 'em there