Pockets Full of Stones

I wait by the front door as strangers pass by

I'm somewhere I don't belong

I need some liquor in my blood cause my body wants to run

I know she's near, don't wanna be here again

Takes me back to the endless self loathing and fear

Long story short I'll cut straight to the point

When you're in the room I block out your voice

Are we both the same?

Afraid of the thought of engaging in small talk

Three breaths in, every inch of my bones are shaking within

Do you think about all the time we had together?

I used to only dwell on the last four weeks

And maybe you are waking

And still tasting his lips on yours I'm not hating

In the end I've learnt it's better for myself If I just let go

I pull up a chair and pretend it's all the same (nothings changed)

It takes a minute but I think I'll stay (think i'll stay)

I built up an idea of what I wanted to you to be

But it was all an excuse to put my mind at ease

A drunk guy ran through a red light

Hit your sister almost took her life

You try to stop the tears so your mascara doesn't run

Who am I to treat you like the person that you used to be

Do you think about all the time we had together?

I used to only dwell on the last four weeks

And maybe you are waking

And still tasting his lips on yours I'm not hating

In the end I've learnt it's better for myself If I just let go

It all floated away

Thrown into the deep end with pockets full of stones