Fembot In A Wet T-Shirt

Looks to me like something funny is going on around here

People laughin' and dancin' and payin' entirely too much for their beer

And they all think they are clean, outta sight

And they're ready to party 'cause the sign outside says it's wet 'T-Shirt Nite'

And they all crave some hot delight

Well the girls are excited because in a minute they're gonna get wet

And the boys are delighted because all the titties will get 'em upset

And they all think they're really alright

And they're ready to boogie 'cause the sign outside says it's wet 'T-Shirt Nite'

And they all crave some pink delight

When the water gets on 'em their ninnies get rigid and look pretty bold

It's a common reaction that makes an attraction whenever it's cold

And all of the fellas they wish they could bite

On the cute little nuggets the local girls are showin' off tonight

You know I think it serves 'em right

You know I think it serves 'em right

You know I think it serves 'em right

You know I think it serves 'em right

And it's wet t-shirt time again!

I know you want someone to show you some tit!

Big ones!

Wet ones!

Big wet ones!

Ah, thanks, I guess it's wet t-shirt time again

Here at The Brasserie, home of the tits (Huh-huh)

And it's the charming Mary from Canoga Park

Up next in her bid for the semi-finals

Hi, Mary, how'ya doin'? (Hi!)

Where ya from?

Ah, the bus

Which one?

You know, the last tour

You know, leather

Oh, you were the girl that was stuck to seat 38 on Phydeaux III

Why don't you get in position now and take a deep breath

Because this water is very, very cold

But it's goin' to be so stimulating

And Mary's the kind of red-blooded American girl who'll do anything

I said anything for fifty bucks, that's right!

I really need the fifty bucks you know I gotta get home

Yeah, I know, your father is waiting for you in the tool shed

That's right, you heard right, our big prize tonight is fifty American dollars

To the girl with the most exciting mammalian protruberances!

Here I ams

As viewed through a thoroughly soaked

Stupid looking, white sort of male person's conservative

Kind of middle-of-the-road cotton undergarment!

Whoopee! And here comes the water!

Ah!

No, you'd squeak more if the water got on you

Sounds like you just got an ice pick in the forehead

And here comes the ice pick in the forehead!

Oooh, ha-ha-ha

A million laughs, Mary!

Anyway, good golly, what a mess, she's totally soaked

Totally (I love it)

Yeah, totally committed to the fifty bucks

That's it just step into the spotlight

Let the guys get a good look at ya, honey!

Here I am!

Whaddya say, fellas? Nice set of jugs?

Now Mary, how's about shakin' it around a little?

Ooooh!

Oh my goodness, look at her go!

Oooh! I'm dancing!

Ain't this what living is really all about?

Here's your fifty bucks, Mary

Oh great! Now I can go home! Oooh!

Home is where the heart is

On the bus!