Yo Girl

I hear last night Martha Dumptruck did a cannonball

Off the Millcreek Bridge holding a suicide note

Oh my God, is she alive?

Just some broken bones

Yet another geek trying to imitate the popular people

And failing big time

Yo girl, keep it together

I knew you would go far

Now you're truly a Heather

Smell how gangster you are

Martha, I'm so sorry

Yo girl, feel a bit punchy?

What's that Brimstoney smell?

Now you've earned that red scrunchy

Come join Heather in Hell

Where have you been?

We've been worried sick

Your friend, JD, stopped by

He told us everything

Everything?

Your depression, your thoughts of suicide

He even showed us your copy of Moby Dick

This is not my handwriting

I've been on the phone all morning

There's a doctor in Cleveland

We'd like you to talk with him

What kind of doctor?

Psychiatric, Leonard

What?

Guess who's right down the block?

You're sending me to a shrink?

Guess who's climbing the stairs?

There's no shame in getting some help

Guess who's picking your lock?

I am not the problem

Time's up, go say your prayers

She took that well

Veronica's running on, running on fumes now

Veronica's totally fried

Veronica's gotta be tripping on 'shrooms now

Thinking that she can hide

Veronica's done for, there's no doubt now

Notify next of kin

Veronica's trying to keep him out now

Too late, he got in

Knock, knock

Sorry to come in through the window

Dreadful etiquette, I know

Get out of my house