The Adult Code

Sighs in the blackest black abiding, as soon as one dies, one is rising

With the night so dark and cold

The wishes I make are swallowed up and hidden away

Breath of the whitest white is

What I most wish to say down deep now inside

Can a voice so numb and cold have some song to sing?

It could be false, or reality

The things I like, or hate, or things I want to gain

Whatever's feeling good is what my lines would say

For setting off the black from white, it'd work perfectly

Though like a chant of ruination it'd be

Why did I think that since I'd studied

The latest schoolbook I'd know clearly

What's right from what's wrong, and which is

Which one, that I could choose, I could really know?

I live according to stage-right, stage-left, exit

Improvisation's not been in my bag of tricks

So much of what I want to say pours out noisily

But never when you're not here alone with me

What I know that I hold in my hands I want to set free

Think of how much lighter you and I would feel then

Every word, every wall, every curse and sparing nothing

Strip it, take it all away to once again see eye to eye

The things I like, or hate, or things I want, expect

Though if I let them out, I think, what happens next?

Well, setting off the white from black is fearful indeed

It's even more so when you live honestly

This life is long, so long, the world is wide, I say

And when we've freedom won, it all becomes one gray

Yes, happiness, unhappiness, it's only the heart

That knows no quietude that makes itself known

While an adult can keep a secret alone