If That Ain't Country, Pt. 2

Well, I'm just an old man now covered with scars And most of them I got fightin' in them redneck bars And a bunch of brand new tattoos that Squinch put on me You know, he covered up the ones I'd gotten years ago Back in prison when I was just Dave Coe And I wasn't famous then, and I wasn't free You know, I grew up in a three-room run-down shack At the foot of the hill by the railroad track Where decent folks don't go when the sun goes down My daddy worked at the Goodyear Tire and Rubber Company And he worked on cars, my mama went to church and my daddy went to bars And most people just called it the hillbilly part of town Had a '55 Chevy when I was 15 I painted it red 'cause I was still green Hell, I couldn't even afford to buy it gas I had a .410 rifle and a Bowie knife, too And Red Man tobacco that I liked to chew And we'd count the cars when the trains went past And if that ain't country, I'll kiss your ass If that ain't country, it'll hair lip the pope If that ain't country, it's a damn good joke I've been on the Grand Ole Opry, and I know Johnny Cash And if he ain't country, well, I'll kiss your ass You know, one of my sisters was a lady of the night And then one day she saw the light And now she don't do those things that she used to do You know, she never made to funeral when my daddy died And I said I'd forgive her, but I guess I lied 'Cause there just ain't no way to hide the way that I feel Now, me and my brothers, we took our sister Diane Down to the funeral home to see the old man Jimmy was the oldest, and Diane, she was the youngest one Jack and Ray was in the middle, and then there was me And I'm the one that turned 23 And grew up to be that Yankee's rebel son Times are changing, I heard Bob Dylan say It's been 15 years now since my father passed away But I can still picture him in his overalls Standing 'round the house where he made his deals Around the porch was a bunch of old wheels And some used Harley Davidson parts that he sold for cash There was 50 holes in an old tin roof Me and my family was living proof And everybody called me old poor white trash And if that ain't country, I'll kiss your ass If that ain't country, it'll hair lip the pope If that ain't country, it's a damn good joke I've been on the Grand Ole Opry, and I know Johnny Cash And if he ain't country, what? (I'll kiss your ass) And if that ain't country, what? (I'll kiss your ass) And if that ain't country, what? (I'll kiss your ass)