I'm Getting Sued By Santa Claus (Album Version)

Now this first song we're gonna listen

Came from the idea that I had in this age of

Political correctness and lawsuits and everybody's

Touchy about everything

So I got to think, "What will be the ultimate lawsuit?"

And it would have to be if you were being sued by Santa Claus

The nicest man on the planet

Is taking you to court

So here it is

"I'm getting sued by Santa"

Christmas day will not be very merry

Explaining to the children will be hard

Well, it's Christmas Eve tonight

And our beagle picked a fight

With some reindeer that were grazing in our yard

I let the dog outside to do his business

I forgot to hook his leash up to the peg

First he and Cupid came to blows

Then he bit Rudolph on the nose

And when I got there he was eying Prancers leg

Now I'm getting sued by Santa Claus

He's claiming mental anguish in his case

Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus

And my kids won't even look me in the face

I tried to throw myself on Santa's mercy

I begged him but I wasn't gettin' through

I said, "It's all your fault, you know"

He said, "Now how can that be so?"

I said, "Because we got the stupid dog from you!"

Now I'm getting sued by Santa Claus

He's claiming mental anguish in his case

Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus

And my kids won't even look me in the face

Hold me!

Oh, I'm gettin' sued by Santa Claus

He's claiming mental anguish in his case

Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus

And my kids won't even look me in the face

Yeah, I'm getting sued by Santa Claus

Now I'm bunkin' with the beagle at his place

Could be just settle out of court?

You know, it's sad

As you and I both know

That that could actually happen these days

Yeah, you'd be sued by Santa Claus

Because you didn't rail around your roof

Or you didn't have on skid proof shingles

You'd go right to jail

Well, I tell you when it wouldn't have happened

It wouldn't have happened when I was a kid

'Cause times where simple back then

And man, I tell you, I got some great memories of Christmas

And I'm sure you do too