If That Ain’t Country

This is a song I wrote about my father

Donald Mahan Coe Jr

My daddy passed away on August the 9th, seven years ago

This is a song about my father

Well, the old man was covered with tattoos and scars

And he got some in prison and others in bars

And the rest he got workin' on old junk cars in the daytime

Now they looked like tombstones in our yard

And I'd never seen him when he wasn't tired and mean

Well, he sold used parts to make ends meet

Covered with grease from his head to his feet

Cussin' the sweat and the Texas heat and the skeeters

And the neighbors said we lived like hicks

But they brung their cars for my paw to fix anyhow

Well, he was veteran-proud, tried and true

He fought 'til his heart was black and blue

And I don't know how he made it through the hard times

He bought our house on the G.I. bill

But it wasn't worth all he had to kill to get it

He drank Pearl in a can and Jack Daniels black

Chewed tobacco from a mail pouch sack

And he had an old dog that was trained to attack sometimes

Well, he'd get drunk and mean as a rattlesnake

And there wasn't too much that he would take from a stranger

There was thirteen kids and a bunch of dogs

A house full of chickens and a yard full of hogs

I spent the summertime cuttin' up logs for the winter

Tryin' like the devil to find the Lord

Workin' like a slave for my room and board

Coal-burnin' stoves, no natural gas

And if that ain't country, I'll kiss your ass

If that ain't country, it'll harelip the pope

If that ain't country, it's a damn good joke

I've been on the Grand Ole Opry

And I know Johnny Cash

And if he ain't country, I'll kiss your ass

Well, my mama sold eggs at a grocery store

And my oldest sister was a first-rate whore

My daddy said she couldn't come home anymore

And he meant it

Now Mama, she was old, far beyond her time

And her hair was gray and I've seen her cryin'

She was talkin' 'bout Junior, said he was dyin' in prison

Why, she told all the neighbors he was off to the war

He was fightin' for courage, he was good to the core

And she was proud

Now our house was a graveyard for automobiles

And around the porch was a bunch of old wheels

And some used Harley Davidson parts that we sold for cash

There was fifty holes in an old tin roof

Me and my family was livin' proof

And everybody called me old poor white trash

And if that ain't country, I'll kiss your ass

If that ain't country, it'll harelip the pope

If that ain't country, it's a damn good joke

I've been on the Grand Ole Opry

And I know Johnny Cash, mmm

And if he ain't country, I'll kiss your ass

And I'm dreaming tonight of my blue eyes

Concerning the great speckled bird

I didn't know God made honky-tonk angels

And went back to the wild side of life