I Want Candy

I want candy

Bubble gum and taffy

Skip to the sweet shop with my sweetheart Sandy

Got my pennies saved, so I'm her sugar daddy

I'm her Hume Cronyn, she's my Jessica Tandy

I want candy

Put it in a pile

Split it with my biddy

Fifty-fifty, down the line

Kinda like "Close Encounters of the 'Cavity' Kind"

I'm talking licorice kisses

Talking chocodile smiles

I want candy

I got a sugar tooth

Put on your shinguards, Sandy, 'cause I wanna knock boots

Lick a peppermint stick 'til the lollipop droop

Gumdrops, it don't stop, 'til it licked knocked loose

(Candy, candy)

I need candy

Bubblegum and taffy

Get in my way, punk, you're gonna get your ass beat, nasty

Do it so your dad sees

Embarrass your whole family

Just 'cause you came between a kid and his candy

I need candy

Any kind'll do

Don't care if it's nutritious or FDA approved

It's gonna make me spaz like bobcats on booze

A hyperactive juice

That only I can produce

That fuels a giant drill, bores straight into hell

Releasing ancient demons from their sleep-forever spell

So they can walk upon the earth, and get resituated

And hawk the diet pills MC Pee Pants have created

I need candy

Want some candy

Eat candy 'til I'm dead

I'll kill you for some candy

Give me candy, candyhead

Where you keeping all the candy?

Who made you Candy King?

If you don't give me some candy I will make the ladies sing!

(Candy, in the morning

Candy on the way to school

Candy, at school, at lunch, in the afternoon

Candy, at school, on the way home from school

Candy, at dinner, at dinner, in bed)

Mess up the mix, mix up the mess

Come on down, yo, here's the address—

Said, 6-1-2

Wharf Avenue

Right next to

Gentleman's Club