Dirty

There was you and the idea of you

The truth and what wasn’t true

The blue light from your window

That shined it’s pretty false hope

The clues I chose to ignore

The shoes sitting by the door

While you built me a fire

asking me to pass the lighter

Now i’m digging through the ashes

wondering what the fuck just happened

Even when I’m fast asleep

I dream of washing my hands clean

Of the person that I thought you’d be

Took something pure and made it dirty

The bar with all the fancy drinks

Where you showed me what books to read

Hemingway and death in the afternoon

You made it look good

You made it seem right

You made it out like you’d better my life

Now I avoid the places we went,

the books and the drinks that i’ve grown to resent

Even when I’m fast asleep

I dream of washing my hands clean

of the person that I thought you’d be

Took something pure and made it

dirty

I think someone’s gotta tell you LA’s not so close to london

When you flew out just to see me I knew you wouldn’t discuss it

Oh I love being a fool, but I don’t care for the lesson

that I learned after bringing up the shit you wouldn’t mention

Even when I’m fast asleep

I dream of washing my hands clean

Of the person that I thought you’d be

Took something pure and made it

Just the bare bones of our memories

That i have to look at honestly

Doesn’t matter what you felt for me

Took something pure and made it dirty