P.D.L.M.A.

P.D.L.M.A

When I was young,

I'd shine like the sun,

I’d sing a little song

For everyone.

They'd all gather 'round;

I was just 40 lbs,

But cuter than a ton of buttons.

They'd all clap their hands;

I’m blessed to have fans,

But every now and then,

Another creepy old man

Would linger around

From town to town,

So I'd hide behind

My dad and the band.

My whole life, this was routine;

They’re everywhere; it's disgusting.

But now I have turned eighteen—

Here's something that’s unforeseen:

The Pedophiles don’t love me anymore.

The Pedophiles don’t love me anymore.

Since the day I turned 18,

They put away their childish dreams.

The Pedophiles don’t love me anymore.

Pictures of feet—I promise I’ll pay;

The requests get stranger every day.

I wanna fatten you up, give you undying love;

Can you sign my van? It’s dark and it’s gray.

See you later

Perpetrator

After-while

Pedophile

Here’s a stuffed yellow cat,

A dress with no back,

A pair of new shoes

With my number attached.

I wanna be where you are,

My personal star.

I’ve got a minor problem;

Do you want to chat?