WTF is House

I don't understand

What don't you understand?

I dunno, it's just—

I don't get it, house music, I don't understand it

Yeah, dude, well I don't really understand what— what there's not to get

It's just pretty simple, dude, it's—

Like, what?

It goes "Boots and cats and boots and cats"

Oh, I heard of that

What?

Yeah, dude, so has everybody

What?

Okay, but like, what if we wanted it to go even harder?

Well, you'd probably just start with a breakdown like this

Then you make 'em wait

Why are we making 'em wait?

It's to build, like, the, the tension

But aren't you supposed to do that with like chords or something?

Yeah, true, true, yeah, we could do that, yeah

Um, or we could just make them wait

What? But that seems boring?

Dude, but that is the essence of house, of waiting

I don't wanna wait

Dude, all of music is waiting

What?

If we wait a little longer, do you think we'll make it to the end of the song?

No

Bitch, no

No

Bitch, no

Okay, well just fuck me up in the meantime

What?

What?

What?

Okay, I still don't get it

Can you say that all again, but better?

Ugh, yeah, sure dude

Look, to keep it simple all house music starts with a kick

Okay, so what's next?

Well, I mean, technically that's all you need

But, there is one more thing you could do

Well, what is it?

But, careful, 'cause all the househats are gonna lose their mind if you do it

Bro, dude, come on, tell me

Just bring in the infamous hi-hat

The what?

Bro, the infamous hi-hat

What?

Damn, they go crazy for that?

Yeah, dude, they do

Oh

Okay, so then where do you go after this?

Well, then you just bring it all back

No

Did the song just say no?

Yeah, now the song's fucking with us

No

Bitch, no

Okay, well just fuck me up in the meantime

Thanks, dude, I learned a lot

Oh, no problem bro, I'm glad you found that interesting

Oh, yeah, I really didn't

I was just kinda bored

Oh, so I guess you won't be listening to house anymore then?

Bitch, no