Growing Pains

I had a dream last night, it was about you

How to, learn to be the one without you

I'm doubtful, that this is all a dream

Cause it's everything it seems, I can feel it in my spleen

But you can't ask for anything, it all comes with a price

Why, cause that's the way of life

And I thought by this time, that I could have a wife

To share about my secrets, to share about them nights

To share about this coma I was in, I had to fight

But this ain't right, to be this lonely

Ignoring you for nights just to chill with the homies

If only, you could see a pattern

Promise ring for man that shit look like it's Saturn

But I can't even share, the shit I got up in my head that you would hear

I got some things that you can't hear within the ears

I got some things that you might love or you might fear

But you crazy, left me cause you wasn't trying to play me

And I can see it in your eyes that you hate me

But don't try and come back when I'm better now

You got a lot of shit to say when I'm not around

I hope you be there at my funeral, I'm underground

And I can't speak to you when everyone's above me now

And I wonder that since I'm dead that you gon' love me now

And I had cold feet

And I believed every word you ever told me

And I believed all the love you ever showed me

But I can't even start to think about the old me

But closely

Look into my eyes, remember all the memories that you had left behind

You wish it was a movie so that you could press rewind

Every time, I can't ever find, who was really mine

Time after time, curve after curve man

I can't stand to hear these words, all these similes and verbs

All the times you said you loved me but you said you loved him first

All this pain inside of me, in each and every nerve

Hold on, why you make me cry baby

Every time that I was with you, you was my baby

But every time it feels like you want me to die baby

It's okay because I'm going suicide crazy

Aye, but I'm happy now

I guess the past is just, kinda past me now

And then my friend had picked me up, then he sat me down

He said "bro imma teach you how to act now"

And then we dapped up

Bet I'm slapping any **** if he act up

Bet I'm smacking any hoe if she get clapped up

And if I rob a ****, I'm gonna have to mask up

But that's not me, damn

Playing basketball and rapping is my hobbies

I don't even like to smoke, but that can't stop me

And I still won't let a **** rob me

Hold up baby, let me meet you in the lobby

Don't call me

Don't text me

I know you hate me

What's next?