I Ain't No Jesus

I ain't no Jesus

Never saved a soul

Never walked on water

Except ice and snow

There's a rumor in the choir

I'm just the luckiest guy they know

But I ain't no Jesus

Never saved a soul

I ain't no Buddha

No, I struggle with wrong from right

I ain't no Prince of Peace

I've hit the floor in a good bar fight

I'll ask forgiveness come Sunday

'Cause I'm asking for trouble Saturday night

But I ain't no Buddha

I struggle with wrong from right

No, I can't walk on water

Can't part the sea

The only miracle I've seen

Is you walking down the aisle to me

No, I can't talk to God

I ain't divine

Only miracle I've seen

Is you'd let your heart be mine

I ain't no carpenter

I'm more sailor than saint

I'd put a hammer on a thumbnail

Swear so loud, they close Heaven's gates

But I built you a four post bed

Now darling, don't make me wait

I ain't no carpenter

I'm more sailor than saint

No, I can't walk on water

Can't part the sea

The only miracle I've seen

Is you walking down the aisle to me

No, I can't talk to God

I ain't divine

The only miracle I've seen

Is you'd let your heart be mine

I ain't no savior

Ain't got the words

How do you preach to the masses

When you can't even talk to the girl?

You get a little courage from holy wine

But then your speech gets slurred

I ain't no savior

I ain't got the words

Now, I can't walk on water

Can't part the sea

The only miracle I've seen

Is you walking down the aisle to me

No, I can't talk to God

I ain't divine

The only miracle I've seen

Is you'd let your heart be mine

The only miracle that I've seen

Is you'd let your heart be mine

You'd let your heart be mine

All mine