Marry Me

Young girl says to her mom, "How did you know that father was the one?"

Then mom just rolls her eyes, she says "You'll find that special guy"

But to herself, she cannot lie, she says "I'm praying for the day I die, and bury me"

Then boy becomes a man, and finds that special one who understands

He knows 'twas meant to be, her faults, he cannot see

And now he's down on bended knee, I pledge my love eternally, will you marry me?

Do you take this woman? (I don't!)

Do you take this man? (I don't!)

For the rest of your awful life, she is your lawful wedded wife

Do you take this woman? (I don't!)

Do you take this man? (I don't!)

Eternal agony in holy matrimony

The two now joined as one, and from this holy union comes a son

So the cycle begins again, another fool is on his knee

Where is my alimony? Hang yourself from the family tree, say marry me

Do you take this woman? (I don't!)

Do you take this man? (I don't!)

Eternal agony in holy matrimony

Do you take this woman? (I don't!)

Do you take this man? (I don't!)

For the rest of your awful life, she is your lawful wedded wife

Menopause, mid-life crisis, moments for the rest of your life

'Til death do you part, 'til the kids leave home, she is your wife

June!

Do you take this woman? (I don't!)

Do you take this man? (I don't!)

For the rest of your awful life, she is your lawful wedded wife

Do you take this woman? (I don't!)

Do you take this man? (I don't!)

Eternal agony in holy matrimony

Just look at your parents' strife, imagine that for the rest of your life

Do you take this woman?

Indubitably, I don't