1-900 L.L. Cool J

I motivate, accelerate

Devastate and dominate

I don't smoke crack so I won't lose weight

Give me the pussy, the money, and the mic and I'm straight

Go to a restaurant, give me a steak

Then cook my chicken with Shake 'n' Bake

I leave all the preachin' to Reverend Flake

How much money can one Black man make?

I'm what's known as a true dynamiter

I write rhymes fast without a typewriter

Go with the flow, but no, I'm not a biter

Can't compare a cockroach and a spider

Hell, you might as well get a glass of punch

'Cause you're bitin' my lyrics like a Nestle Crunch

And bitin' my rhymes ain't slick

I got your gold teeth marks all over my dick

Complications and aggravation

An unnecessary-sation

I'm like Sunkist, good vibrations

Your album sounds like a compilation

Cool out, grab a seat, and listen

'Cause I'ma start dismissin'

Sucker MCs who's out there frontin'

Talkin' all that yang, yo, you smokin' something

Shoulda treated me royal, yo, he wasn't loyal

Now it's all about chaos and turmoil

Gimme that microphone

I'ma show you the real meaning of the danger zone

Now when I'm coolin' out, no time for a granny

Just a fly girl in t-shirt and panties

Man, can he (Can LL screw?)

I tell you what, give up the fanny

'Cause on a bedroom tune, J's swift

Not too big, but nothing to play with

In addition, you on a mission

You need to audition for another position

Doin' damage is a crew tradition

Name your next album Intermission

You're full of preservatives, plus

You're too conservative

I'm full of flair, savoir faire, debonaire

There's no competition for this here

So don't waste your time and breath

I'm giving you all a big F

MCs I envelop

As the song goes on, the rhyme develops

I'm asiatic, acrobatic, charismatic

You don't want no static

Anyway, I ain't havin' it

When I see the microphone, I'm grabbin' it

Plug it in and take charge

LL XL, extra large