Put On Tha Set

I got put on the set, smokin Jimmy Jacks in a shack

With my **** Coolio, got me to' the fuck back

High as a UFO, standin' in my drawers

In the hall, talkin' to the walls

Now a ****'s spooked, umm

Heavens to merkatroids, I'm looped!

I'm tripping! **** what do I see?

It's me, that **** Dub C on the TV

Now I know I'm buzzed

Cause I'm on the TV but the TV's unplugged

Damn, this shit is like the Twilight Zone

Na-na-na-na, na-na-na-na; I'm blowed!

Cause now I'm havin illusions, illusions

Of me on channel eleven on a black and white tube and

Mack and the Gene are on the Martin show

Hangin with Sheneneh sippin on a four-oh

Now I know I'm trippin "Oh my goodness!"

Let me change the TV and

Dizamn! Once again there I go

But this time it's channel thirteen on Arsenio

I'm smokin a wet one on the couch

Givin up a fat middle finger to the crowd

I'm faded, but not in a way in which you ever seen

Peep the side effects, yeah, I'm on the set

Asshole naked standin in front of the set; I'm wet

Ain't no escapin when yo' ass is wet; I'm wet

Look, look, way up in the sky

Everybody just look, look, and you'll find me flyin high

So there I was, standin in front of the set mesmerized

Kickin off the scenery right before me eyes

High as a motherfucker what was I to do?

Cause now the yerm has got me thinkin I'm on channel two

Peep it -- bip-bip-bip like the bi-on-ic man I'm out of control

And now I see myself on Highway Patrol

Runnin from the Feds tryin to make my get away

But there's nowhere to run, ba-bay

And now exhausted from this drama I needed a rest

So I went on channel four so I can catch my breath

Now who's this after five minutes of bein there

I met this motherfucker named the Fresh Prince of Bel Air

Yeah this **** was funny I must admit it

But his Uncle and his cousin Carlton was straight bitches

Them **** was cock blockin, talkin bout killin me

Cause I told em I wanted to fuck the shit out of Hillary, ooh

Now what's a real or just a fantasy, all I know

Is she was lookin good sportin them t-shirt and panties, huh

I can't believe this shit, **** I'm wet

Fuck tricks, my mind is playin with dipsticks, I'm on the set

Still blowed from the chemicals I'm askin was it worth it

Cause like Slick Rick now Dub C is scared and I'm nervous

Cause now the TV's changin by itself, uh-oh danger

Cause now I see myself on channel nine on the Gladiators

I'm swingin on a rope with a gauge

Boom, bang bang, you **** can't hang

Fuck a obstacle fool, I had them buff bitches runnin

Mass confusion now I hear one-time comin

So I swung to the exit, jumped off and jetted

Thank God mama kept the baby gat ready

I left all them bitches behind

Til I got to channel fifty-two and there I found myself on Good Times

Here was me and this **** named J.J

Out on a double date, just sippin on Kool-Aid

Now umm, ain't no need for me to pretenda

Like my date was all that like J.J.'s boo-boo Belinda

Yo, but she had a ass like Thelma, titties like Walona

Drunk off the Mad Dog I fucked around and boned her

Like J.J. the pussy was dy-no-mite though

I must admit the ho had a mug as ugly as Flo'

I'm on tha set