Unbecoming

I lost myself into the night

And I flew higher than I had ever, but I still felt small

I clipped my wings and fell from flight

To open water, and floated farther away from myself

And I swam in the wakes of imposters

Just to feel what it's like to pretend

There's no dreams in the wakes, only monsters

And the monsters are my only friends

They're all that I was

And never could be

Eyes in the dead, still water

Tried, but it pushed back harder

Cauterized and atrophied

This is my unbecoming

Knives in the backs of martyrs

Lives in the burning fodder

Cauterized and atrophied

This is my unbecoming

You found me drifted out to sea

It's automatic, it's telepathic, you always knew me

And you laugh as I search for a harbor

As you point where your halo had been

But the light in your eyes has been squandered

There's no angel in you in the end

And all that I was

I've left behind me

Eyes in the dead, still water

Tried, but it pushed back harder

Cauterized and atrophied

This is my unbecoming

Knives in the backs of martyrs

Lives in the burning fodder

Cauterized and atrophied

This is my unbecoming

Now, I await

This metamorphosis

All that is left is the change

Selfish fate

I think you made me this

Under the water, I wait

Eyes in the dead, still water

Tried, but it pushed back harder

Cauterized and atrophied

This is my unbecoming

Knives in the backs of martyrs

Lives in the burning fodder

Cauterized and atrophied

This is my unbecoming