I'm Bad

(Calling all cars, calling all cars)

(Be on the lookout for a tall, light-skinned brother with dimples)

(Wearing a black Kangol, sweatsuit, gold chain and sneakers)

(Last seen on Farmers Boulevard heading east)

(Alias, LL Cool J)

(He's bad)

Ahh

No rapper can rap quite like I can

I'll take a musclebound man and put his face in the sand

Not the last Mafioso, I'm a MC cop

Make you say, "Go, LL," and do the wop

If you think you can out rhyme me, yeah, boy, I bet

'Cause I ain't met a motherfucker who can do that yet

Trendsetter, I'm better, my rhymes are good

I got a gold nameplate that says, "I wish you would"

And when battles begin then I gotta join in and

Before my rhyme is over, you know I'ma win

Cool J has arrived, so you better make way

Ask anybody in the crowd they say, the kid don't play

Slaughter competition, that's my hobby and job

I don't wear a disguise because I don't owe the mob

Gotta pinpoint rap that makes you feel trapped

So many girls on my jock, I think my phone is tapped

I'm bad

I'm like Tyson, icin', I'm a soldier at war

I'm makin' sure you don't try to battle me no more

Got concrete rhymes, been rappin' for ten years and

Even when I'm braggin', I'm being sincere

MC's can't win, I make 'em rust like tin

They call me Jaws, my hat is like a shark's fin

Because I'm bad as can be, got my voice on wax

Some brothers think he's makin' records, now he must've relaxed

I couldn't, shouldn't and it'll stay that way

The best rapper you've heard is LL Cool J

Kamikaze, take a look at what I've done

Used to rock in my basement, now I'm number one

And can happen on time, never standin' on line

You wanna try me? First you better learn how to rhyme

I'm the pinnacle, that means I reign supreme

And I'm notorious, I'll crush you like a jelly bean

I'm bad

(Suspect was last spotted with three other members of his group)

(The Bobcat, the E Love and the Cut Creator)

(They are extremely bad)

(So keep your eyes open)

(Use extreme caution)

I eliminate punks, cut 'em up in chunks

You were souped, you heard me and your ego shrunk

I'm devastating, I'm so good it's a shame

'Cause I eat rappers like a cannibal, they call me insane

I'm as strong as a bull, of course, you know why I pull

I enjoy what I'm doin', plus, I'm paid in full

Not Buckaroo Banzai, but busted out as I

Say the kinda rhymes that MC's wish that I'd die

Never retire or put my mic on the shelf

The baddest rapper in the history of rap itself

Not bitter or mad, just provin' I'm bad

You want a hit? Give me a hour plus a pen and a pad

MC's retreat 'cause they know I can beat 'em

And eat 'em in a battle and the ref won't cheat 'em

I'm the best, takin' out all rookies

So forget Oreo's, eat Cool J cookies

I'm bad

Never ever, no, never

Never wearin' no Levi's, battle me, why try?

I'll treat you like a stepchild, so tell mommy, "Bye bye"

Slaughterin' MC's and I'ma never get whipped

When I retire, I'll get worshiped like a old battleship

LL, I'm bad, other rappers know

When I enter the center, they say, "Yo, yo, there he go"

My paycheck's large, Mr. Bogart in charge

Not a puncher or a hunter from a raccoon lodge

The original Todd, teachin' how to be hard

Take the skin off a snake and split a pea from a pod

You're a novice, I'm noble and I dissect with my tongue

Not Attila the Hun gun or Abdullah his son

My vocals exact like rack and pinion in a Jag

You try to brag, you get your rhymes from a grab-bag

No good scavenger, catfish vulture

My tongue's a chisel and this competition' sculpture

I'm bad

(Think I'm gonna need backup)

(I think I'm gonna need backup)

(Gimme that walkie talkie)

(Yo, this is LL Cool J)

(And you'll never catch me, so don't even try it)

(I'm too bad for ya, understand?)

I-I'm bad