Everybody's Talking About Jamie

You shoulda seen it, you shoulda been there

You won't believe the shit we saw that went down in there

The men were women, the girls are fellas

They did arrangements wearing nothing but umbrellas

There was a lady, she had a sister

But it was kinda weird the way the lady kissed her

There was a woman whose name was Norman

And her frilly knickers (That was just the doorman) (Pass it on)

There was a doorman whose name was Norman

And then the doorman kissed his sister (She's a Mormon)

And then there's dungeons inside the cellars

Where they rain down pain and spank you with umbrellas

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie

Everybody's talking 'bout J-J-Jamie

Everybody's talking 'bout the boy in the dress, who was born to impress

Everybody's talking 'bout the things that he wore

Everybody's listening 'cause they need to know more

Everybody's talking 'bout the boy in the wig, 'cause he's gonna be big

Everybody's talking 'bout Ja-a-a-amie

And there was music, and there was dancin'

And all the drag queens had to lip-sync cause they can't sing (Pass it on)

And there was smoking, and there were boozing

And there were boys that looked like girls, which were confusing (Pass it on)

So, what's a lip sync? Is that like kissing?

Yeah, he kissed a girl whose girly parts were missing

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie

Everybody's talking 'bout J-J-Jamie

Everybody's talking 'bout the boy on the stage, who broke out of his cage

Everybody's talking 'bout the switch and the lips

Everybody's talking 'bout the tits and the hips

Everybody's talking 'bout the crazy kid, and all the things that he did

Everybody's talking 'bout Ja-a-a-amie

He had one go-go boy, five go-go boys

Ten go-go boys in kilts (In kilts)

He had one dancing girl, five dancing girls

Ten dancing girls on stilts (On stilts)

He had one backing singer, five backing singers

Ten backing singers, plus choir

He did one somersault, five somersaults

Ten somersaults on fire

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie

Everybody's talking 'bout J-J-Jamie

Everybody's talking 'bout the buzz from the crowd, and the boy who was proud

Everybody's talking 'bout Ja-a-a-amie

And there were cocktails, and there were mocktails

She wore a scaly skirt she said were made of croc tails

And there were feathers, and there were leathers

And there were rubber gear she said were for all weathers

And there were thigh boots, and there were high boots

And there were girl-boots-that-you-wear-if-you're-a-guy boots

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie (Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie)

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie (Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie)

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie (Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie)

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie (Everybody's talking 'bout)

Everybody's talking 'bout Jamie, everybody's talking 'bout Jamie

Everybody's talking 'bout the boy in the dress, who was born to express

Everybody's talking, and they're talking about

The eyes, and the thighs, and the puh-puh-puh-pout

Everybody's talking, and there ain't no doubt who we're dying to see

Everybody's talking 'bout Ja-a-a-a-a-a-a-amie