Camping

No I don't wanna go camping See I have this thing as a human being Where I don't want to die And if I die (big if) It won't be via bear attack in the woods Because it's preventable That's not what we're here for And I'm sorry if I don't see how All of you can be so flippant about An all day near-death experience Or as you call it "a hike" And they say we need trees to breathe But I'm breathing right now And I don't see any trees so Seems more like those fuckin' trees need me (Yeah!) No I don't wanna go camping. Imagine all the ancient people's faces in the afterlife They'll be like, "How'd you die?" And with a stick through my neck, I'll say, "Camping" They'll say, "Why'd you sleep outdoors by choice after centuries inside?" I don't know! But then you claim "It'll be fun if we're on mushrooms" "We should all take mushrooms" Well who the fuck is we? Oh because me No I don't want to take mushrooms No I'm not gonna do mushrooms And then freeze to death as I pee No I don't wanna go camping Give me an RV with an A/C and even then it's a no No I don't wanna go camping. But if the whole group's going Then fine I guess I'll go