Old Wounds

When the old wounds are open and jealousy's bleeding

I won't write it in blood ink, it'll spill on the ground

I try to stay in the moment and focus on my breathing

But it turns into nothing, it just weighs me down

I want to let this kill me

'Cause I'm not strong enough to tie a tourniquet

At least I'd die a quicker death

Than waiting till I'm ninety

When all my skin and bones are dry and withering

I want to feed my body to the soil that I'm buried in

But what if I can't take this pain and turn it into something beautiful?

And it's not that easy to let it all out

I've tried everything to shut it down

Even when I'm bleeding out, I find a way to make it stay inside of my mouth

When the surface is broken and anger leaves its hiding

I won't ball my fists up, I'll pretend that I'm fine

I wish that this would fuel me

Instead of being proof that I'm not good enough

I want to fight my old beliefs

And teach myself some kind of love

But I can't take this pain and turn it into something beautiful

And it's not that easy to let it all out

I've tried everything to shut it down

Even when I'm bleeding out, I find a way to make it stay inside of my mouth

Inside of my mouth