Ronnie Rigor Mortis

Ronnie worked the Waffle House

Had the 3rd shift

Had a body in his truck

He had yet to deal with

So

Whoops

He dug a hole in the ground

For mean Mrs. Delores

And there's a good reason he's known

As Ronnie Rigor Mortis

Delores started askin

A few too many questions

About the trailer by the Bojangles

On highway 77

Sure, a lab by a chicken place ain't ideal

But Ronnie makes sure that nobody's gonna squeal

And Ronnie Rigor Mortis ain't got no warrants yet

Yeah Ronnie Rigor Mortis ain't got no warrants yet

Ronnie was the muscle

And Randy was the cook

Cooked everyday but Sunday

To honor the good book

It was waffles at night

And ice during the day

Coulda been a good livin

If it stayed that way

Yeah Ronnie Rigor Mortis ain't got no warrants yet

Don't need a warrant for a man that's dead

Randy killed Ronnie with the poison fried chicken

Took the money and the trailer and his truck with him

When they found his body sometime the next day

Ronnie Rigor Mortis wasn't just a name

Ronnie I told you Delores is my grandmother

You-

Why'd you do that

She was 95

Well she said

She said

She comin round here she said "ohhhh ohh Randy

What are you doin out by the Bojangles again ohhh

Yeah- thats cuz- she's checkin-

Whatcha doin whats that what in that trailer oh ohhh"

She had to go Randy

Ronnie-

She had to go

I'm gonna-

I don't care if she's blind, she's gotta go

Ronnie?

Yep

I-

Yep

You know what? Let's get lunch

I'm gonna go to the Bojangles

You want- you want a chicken sandwich

You want fried chicken?

Yeah I'll take fried chicken! With a iced tea

Ok alright

Thanks Randy, that- you know

Yeah

That's really nice of you even though I

Killed your grandmother

Yeah I'll be right back

You're welcome