A Lancashire DJ (Ricardo Autobahn Dub)

Oh, I’m a DJ and I’ll make you dance

Wi’ a little bit o' techno, a little bit of trance

Play anything that you like

From Eric Prydz to Paul van Dyk

Got two turntables and a microphone

I’ll play some house for your Aunty Joan

I know just how fert rock the place

Wi’ a little bit of hardcore drum and bass

In ’88 I were on a bender

I ended up in the Hacienda

The summer of love you had to be there

It were all house music, smileys and flares

I danced so hard, I split me keks

The very next day I bought some decks

And ever since that fateful day I’ve been a Lancashire DJ

Oh, I’m a DJ and I’ll make you dance

Wi’ a little bit o' techno, a little bit of trance

Play anything that you like

From Eric Prydz to Paul van Dyk

Got two turntables and a microphone

I’ll play some house for your Aunty Joan

I know just how fert rock the place

Wi’ a little bit of hardcore drum and bass

Now while the wife is baking cakes

I’m at the Labour club playing breaks

Every Tuesday at the old folks home

I play ‘em mashups and they never moan

I sometimes go down to the vets

For a four hour techno set

I’ve got a PA from me Uncle Harry

We’ll have a midnight rave at the Cash & Carry

Oh, I’m a DJ and I’ll make you dance

Wi’ a little bit o' techno, a little bit of trance

Play anything that you like

From Eric Prydz to Paul van Dyk

Got two turntables and a microphone

I’ll play some house for your Aunty Joan

I know just how fert rock the place

Wi’ a little bit of hardcore drum and bass

Well, I’m always asked for requests

I ‘ant always got ‘em but I do me best

Me Aunty Mable loves KLF

But I ‘aft play it loud 'cos she’s half deaf

Daft Punk are the favourites of Mr. Patel

But he’ll listen to a little bit of Faithless as well

I nearly give me Grandma a heart attack

When I crank up the hits from the Basement Jaxx

Oh, I’m a DJ and I’ll make you dance

Wi’ a little bit o' techno, a little bit of trance

Play anything that you like

From Eric Prydz to Paul van Dyk

Got two turntables and a microphone

I’ll play some house for your Aunty Joan

I know just how fert rock the place

Wi’ a little bit of hardcore drum and bass

Vinyl? It's not even CD anymore got it on MP3