Mr. Gellman's Shirt

16 feet beneath the sea

Caroline, look at Mr. Gellman's shirt

He must've left a quarter

In the front breast pocket

You must've ironed over it, look

It's the head of the Father of our Country

Mr. George Washington

Seared into the fabric

Like the face of Jesus

On the Shroud of Turin

So I guess Mr. Gellman has to learn the rule

He loses any change he leaves

And you can keep it,

Just like Noah's, you can keep it

Just like Noah's

I don't want it!

I ain't some ragpick

Ain't some jackdaw

Of course you're not

I don't want your husband's money

Oh, it's not your fault about the quarter

I-

I got a load of laundry left

So excuse me, Mrs. Gellman

From now on I'll check every pocket

Put the money in the bleach cup

His and Noah's

Yours as well

Oh, I never leave my money in my pockets

My father would have whupped me

Smacked me

If I find money now

I put it in the bleach cup

And you people do

Whatever you want with it

Take the damn money, Mrs. Gellman

Stop bothering me with it

You need anything else?

You need anything, anything, anything else?

Now, you wait a second, lady

I got to iron now

Iron now, iron now

It cramped in here

And there's no air

So please get out

So my arm can swing

With this hot iron

And not hit nobody