Gospel Night At The Strip Club

It's gospel night at the strip club, been sleepin' in my car

I lead the singin' service with a half-ass tuned guitar

Brandy's singin' backup while Lonnie's tendin' bar

Just waitin' for more sinners to show up

And Crystal just started dancin', she's always right on point

She don't mind if you don't tip her as long as you slip her a joint

And Patti's got an upper to get her through her shift

And a downer so she can lay down with the kids

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Jesus loves the drunkards and the whores and the queers

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Would you recognize him if he bought you a beer?

Lonnie, he's a listener, he shoulda been a priest

It's the same confession on a barstool or your knees

He makes a mean Manhattan, but he ain't drank since '93

Does the last call benediction, then wipes the bar slate clean

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Jesus loves the drunkards and the whores and the queers

Hallelujah, hallelujah

Would you recognize him if he bought you a beer?

The same old dirty dollars keep gettin' passed around

To whoever needs 'em most, and I guess that's me right now

'Cause I'm starin' at this Jackson someone laid here at my feet

And that's gas in my ol' Honda and somethin' warm to eat

Hallelujah (Hallelujah), hallelujah (Hallelujah)

Jesus loves the drunkards and the whores and the queers

Hallelujah (Hallelujah), hallelujah (Hallelujah)

He laid down a twenty and then he disappeared